Pure friendship have no name......

 It is important to hold on to those who genuinely care, because in times like these, they are very rare…..If we loosen our grip or snap our connection, there might not be another chance for redemption.

If we look around us, everybody is getting more and more selfish, and true love has ceased to exist. A do-gooder is always questioned for her intentions/design of why it is done. There has to be some motive behind an act, there can never be a deed without a purpose. Relationships are going sour. There is no genuine love in this world anymore.

What with those crazy labels that are attached to every relationship?

 If you love someone of opposite sex, you will be labeled as flirtatious, show the concern and love to same sex, and you will be labeled as gay/lesbian. Sex plays the important part in everybody’s life; there cannot be pure love anymore, especially not for a person who is single.

 A single person has to be pitied at all cost.

Why didn’t they find a mate? Is something wrong with them? What do single people do in their free time? Do they watch a porno to curb their libido? Or perhaps they use some dildos? Are they sex starved? It’s funny how far their imaginations can run.

 Sometimes I feel like addressing things. And what gets me tired is how often we can see the need to address things before we get tired of doing just that! I mean, why do we have to give explanations of our every deed and every act?

 One advantage a single person enjoys is that they don’t have to deal with insecurities of others. They are their own boss. If they decide to indulge in certain activities, it is purely for their pleasure. If they decide to reach out to people who care, it need not necessarily mean that they seek out sexual contentment.

 But the present scenario of gay/lesbian concept has eclipsed all relationships.

 Ouch! Even an innocent act of just holding hands, or a peck on a cheek, is watched suspiciously. Communication is important ... "how" we communicate is of the utmost importance. In the friendships, there may be pure intimate relationship and there is tendency to read "exactly” what is said without needing or wanting more because the outcome of a conversation may not have as much meaning as it is expected.

We're emotional beings ... right?

No apology necessary there... how we process these emotions and think things through can make all the world of difference.

 Friendship can be experienced and identified individually only by person involved in that relation. Until very recently, much of what has been documented about women's sexuality has been written by men, in the context of male understanding, and relevant to women's associations to men—as their wives, daughters, or mothers,

 During the 17th through 19th centuries, a woman expressing passionate love for another woman was fashionable, accepted, and encouraged. Whether the relationship included any genital component was not a matter for public discourse, but women could form strong and exclusive bonds with each other and still be considered virtuous, innocent, and chaste; a similar relationship with a man would have destroyed a woman's reputation. In fact, these relationships were promoted as alternatives to and practice for a woman's marriage to a man.

Around the turn of the 20th century the development of higher education provided opportunities for women. In all-female surroundings, a culture of romantic pursuit was fostered in women's colleges.

Older students mentored younger ones, called on them socially, took them to all-women dances, sent flowers, cards, and poems that declared their undying love for each other.

The invisibility of lesbians has gradually eroded since the early 1980s.

Psychiatrists and feminist philosophers noted that the rise in women acknowledging same sex relationships is due to growing social acceptance, but also conceded that "only a certain kind of lesbian—slim and elegant or butch in just the right androgynous way—is acceptable to mainstream culture. 

Yet, the term “Lesbians/Gay” is so liberally used in present scenario!

How ignorant can one get? It is outrageous! It has curbed our desire to express our love to people whom we truly care. FB has many applications to express our friendship, but we are afraid to post it to our virtual friends, always afraid of forming a wrong notion. Should we send a bear hug across? a gift perhaps or a comment on superwall? How intimate can one get over the internet?

 Should we really care?

Hottie Companions

I have tried many different types of chilies during my globe trotting although I cannot remember their names… The hottest variety of chilies that I have ever had is orange habanero which has a heat unit of 210,000, its heat much, much higher as compared to other variety such as: tabasco: 120,000 jalapeno M: 25,000 Long Slim cayenne: 23,000 pasilla: 5,500 serrano: 4,000 bell: 0 Chilies are quite useful especially as thug-repelling pepper spray and there is also an ointment that contains the active ingredient in chili peppers is used to soothe sore muscles. Another good use: Chili powder is fed to captive flamingoes to keep their feathers pink. But the most popular reason that I love them is for their flavor and my food is never complete without chilies. While in Suriname, we would get orange habanero (which were yellowish in color and had peculiar taste) so hot, that it would burn the fingers that held it, my mom would use gloves to cut it but I used to eat it raw, till I started developing painful infection in my ears. (may be, its’ fumes were developing the fungus in my ears) My favorite meal was Surinamese style ‘Chicken Roti’, which was white flour roti, stuffed with chicken, string beans and lots of red chutney made from these hot peppers…hmmn…I m still drooling….. But when I migrated to Canary Island, I was surprised with the bland food…the hottest sauce that one can get in Tenerife is Tabasco….I found food so tasteless that I would carry a small bottle of home-made chilly paste in my hang-bag all the time…. I also enjoy the food in Bangkok, which is not only hot and spicy but very, very delicious. Now that I am back home in Mumbai, I enjoy the wicket chilies, which are mild and yet so tasty to eat. I am so popular for my inventive chillie cutney recipes that many times, I may meet an acquaintance on the road and she will immediately ask me the recipe of the chutney that she had tasted in my house. Cannot write more about chilies on empty stomach, You.know what I mean?

Invisible soulmates on facebook

Face is potholed by too many pokes Of friends and families of every nook Vampires’ fights, somersaulting quizzes Dearest friends’ shadows, hugs and looks I enjoy playing Lexulous, and visiting links, Love reading their notes from their profile winks Many summers ago, on a lazy day like this Like a couch potato I would just gape at a book

Approaching Frowns

"A kind heart is a fountain of gladness, making everything in its vicinity freshen into smiles."-- Washington Irving In India, I have noticed that people, especially writers will never smile unless they want to interview you. They are compatible only in books, where they will take you through strange cities, make you experience the most exotic places, stir you with their romantic adventures and amuse you with their rib tickling tales but meet them face-to-face, and you will be lucky if you even get a smile. On social networks you will get smiles, hugs, gifts and even kisses from the friends whom you have never ever met, but offline? Meet them randomly and see them squirm. Smile is reserved only for those who are close friends. In a group of good writers, if you are shy then you will be a lone ranger. Unless, of course, if you are a successful writer or one with great looks! But, is smile an expensive commodity only in India? During my recent visit to China, my smile froze on Chinese plastered face, nobody was smiling, neither anyone at the customs nor at the immigration office - same reason- I was a stranger who had neither great looks nor any achievements to boast about, although, like Indians, Chinese too, smile for more reasons than Americans. A smile can mean the person is embarrassed, trying to be helpful, curious, happy or friendly. In the middle of an argument, it may mean that it is nothing personal. When all else fails, their smile shows you have no ill feelings and can work wonders in getting better service. The smile is the near universal gesture of friendliness, and in America, its meaning is usually clear. While in America, everywhere I went, be it supermarket, mall or public library, I found every American smiling and wishing me the hour of the day. But, there too, Asian reserved this smiling gesture for informal occasions, and smiling while being formally introduced was considered disrespectful. In Spain, where I lived for several years, smiling faces surrounded me everywhere. It comes natural to them, they don’t stare, but smile instead. They are so friendly, that many times they will come across the street to greet you with a peck on your cheek. In Spain, I learnt to smile at every stranger, whenever there was an eye contact. But now, I am back in Mumbai. When I see cold eyes, tight closed lips, I am confused. I am learning that I can only return a smile for a smile, in an elitist society, it will be misunderstood.

Reading - passion transformed.

If I had been able to store all my books that I have bought during many years (and not having lost any, during my migrations and uprooting, that has happened about five times in my life), I would have had a very huge library.. Before the internet occupied my comfort zone, I could never go to sleep without reading a book…and during the daytime too,(to avoid conversation with a stranger) reading was my savior, any and every reading material was important to me, be it a magazine, or a thick novel, a children’s story book or granny’ spiritual book, and sometimes even a wrapper of my bhelpuri or a peanut packet. (I would transfer the peanuts into my palm, open the conical packet, straighten it and read the contents while I munched on the peanuts) Even during traveling in a bus, whenever I shifted my gaze from my book, and peeped out of window, it would be to read the signs on the road, scripts on hoardings and even the shop names. If my co-passenger was reading and I would find myself peeping into their book (curious to know what they are reading) or pick up a sentence to mull about. But now…..Alas! My reading habits have found a new home and my computer is my library. Moreover, I need glasses to read and this has limited my reading habit. (Especially traveling a short distance, it is cumbersome, to remove the specs from my purse to read a book, and then remember to put it away carefully before you alight the transport.) Nowadays, I buy only one book at a time, and it follows a particular sequence, I buy a book, read it and pass it on. (I think I have reached Nirvana because I have no more attachment to anything, not even to my books.) I just have few collection of books left which I have managed to store them at different spots in the house (actually I don’t have enough space). And everybody is welcomed to pick up any book from my shelf and keep it. I don’t care if they forget to return it…..I can survive. I enjoy books that have a story stretching over several years; also I like to read biographies, success stories, humor, suspense, thriller, adventure and romance. I don’t like reading books such as ‘Self Help Books’ ‘Self development’, ‘How to…’ or ‘Self Improvement’ books because I want to learn from my own experience. If someone recommends me to read a particular book, and if I trust her choice, then I always read it…. I am always curious to know my friend’s selection of books.…….and luv to know what they are reading.....