Do we need validation from outside to prove our self worth?

I don’t think so. I think only the children need to be praised from time to time and they need encouragement at every stage. But we, as adults have already formed our own opinions and we know who we are and how valuable we are, why do we need validation from others to prove our self worth? Don’t we trust our own opinions? I look into the mirror every morning and say “Mirror, mirror on the wall.. you better agree....I am the best” I feel good about myself but if people don’t agree with me during the day then I am sorry for their poor judgment that they fail to recognize the beautiful me…..it is their loss…. I am not dependent on social validation, if I don’t get invitation for a party or an outing, I am glad that I get an opportunity to spend quality time with some one whose company I truly enjoy….My normal life is never disturbed by this........if we depended on validation for our every action and failed to receive any, our self esteem would be completely crushed. It is important to have faith in one self and believe in oneself and not to walk in any ones’ shadow, we can't be wrong if we are sure what we do is right and we are willing to take full responsibility for our own actions and will face its consequences. It is the choice we make. A choice of responsibility to control our own life

Stars on the ground?

I finally saw the movie ‘Tare Zameen Par’…(tax-free.) and I loved it.. My heart reached out specially, towards the kid, who feels crushed under the weight of rejection, it is the story closer to reality and it reminded me of my own childhood, because I, too, spend most of my primary school years out of the class and was repeatedly abused by my teachers who couldn’t cope up with my dumbness and my inability to concentrate on my studies. I hated my teachers and would be more stubborn and disobedient. Still I had great respect for my teachers at secondary school and I nursed the dream of teaching in school, but not beating the children when they were not able to cope with their studies. I am glad that my dreams came true, some twenty years later and that I got opportunity to teach special children and have enjoyed the experience of reaching out to them and communicating with them to a certain extend.. A familiar cord run through those experiences…I have met many dyslexic kids and found that the child and his parents both suffer. The child, Dursheel, in this movie is so adorable, I felt like hugging him, especially when he was sad and confused. Teachers are normally drawn towards weak ones because it is a challenge for them to help a slow child. What I don’t understand is why teachers portrayed (in movies) are either very strict or they are jokers. Teachers are the role models and they are usually aware of different problems that child might have, teachers need to be respected, not laughed or ridiculed at….like a group of boys, standing behind the teacher, during drawing competition and peeping in his painting and giggling…or that moment when Amir Khan tell the kids to show the seat to their teacher and the child takes his teacher to seats him beside his caricature. I don’t think that is funny, it is disrespectful. Children who watch the movie might feel that it is okay to show disrespect to their teachers. Movies, besides being an entertainment medium, they are also educational. Therefore they should be made with more responsibility and portray a decent and appropriate behavior, both from the teachers and the kids. However, the movie was enjoyable and their emotions touched our heart. It is especially informative for parents who expect too much from their children and crush their children’s ego by comparing them with the brighter kids. Every child is unique and every parent should be sensitive of their child’s ability and help them grow to bloom independently. The childhood memories linger in their mind for many years and they help shape their personality when they grow up.

Getting connected with a Sindhi across the border...

On Sindhi Global network I got connected with a Sindhi from Pakistan, who gave me some insight about the Sindhis living across the border. He sounded distressed that we are divided over the religion and all the educated Sindhis migrated and only the uneducated landlords stayed behind who only saw their own benefits. He was wondering if we could be united again by common language, culture and tradition. Our forefathers were driven out of their comfort zone and left to fend for themselves. What do we know about what they left behind? And will the youth of tomorrow care? Our parents left penniless, leaving behind their wealth, their emotions and their language. They carried their culture and their tradition with them, but we must not forget that they went to a strange land, and adapted to it. What can you do with Sindhi language in a foreign land? Can you do business? Can you survive without learning to speak in their common language? I have never been to Pakistan to view the life styles of the land and we have little knowledge about the traditions and culture followed back there….we have no communications with the Sindhis living beyond that border, so in what way can we identify with it? We have heard stories, lots of them from our parents who lived there….they would speak about their happy memories in those narrow lanes…about the food they enjoyed, about the traditions that they followed but are they still there? We have no idea. The media paints a different picture. We teach children to speak Sindhi at home (and it sound cute when a three year old speaks that language) but to live in a society of various culture, we learn different language, and we need to, but adhering to the language is difficult. We don’t have schools and colleges to promote the language, nah, not in a foreign land. But can we do something about it now? What we can do now is just to be a good human being and waste no time in making a fuss over what we have already lost. We don’t want people branding Sindhi and saying nasty things. We don’t like people says that “Sindhis are fighting crabs” or “Sindhis are like that only” or “You are Sindhi if you…..” we want to be remembered as a good human being, each one of us are unique in our own way…not somebody to be ridicule at. We need to move on. If we can revive the language, then we can do so…but to be on practical side, it is better not to expect much, because the youth of today have already adapted to the foreign land and they need to speak in the language which is for their progress. We are Sindhis who are successful, who concentrate more on business or jobs and are peace loving people. We mind our own business and have no land to fight for. We still have culture and traditions which we do follow and it is on that string we can all hang on…… However, he send some interesting videos that were worth watching.. pleasant to the ears (Sindhi music) and pleasant to eyes…..(Sindhi folks back home) Watch some Sindhi Videos 'HERE'
It is fantastic

Lonliness

Living alone on your own terms is a win-win situation… At the end of the day, calm and peace reigns and we count our blessing when we see a squirming couple fight for space. Loneliness is the state of mind that is not proportional to the being single or married nor is it proposional to the number of people that you may be surrounded. It is something you feel when you can’t find somebody to agree with you, to share your thoughts or help you when you need them the most. But it is not always the spouse who fills that void. It can be filled by anybody whom we allow that privilege; it could also be a best friend or a family too. To overcome loneliness, it is best not to wait for somebody to drop in and dilute our emptiness but to go out there and venture into this wild world, erase the loneliness of a friend (spouse or a close friend) and spread the joy and happiness and then see your own self bloom.

Six Events...lets participate!

In January, I plan to take part in 'Six events'. What I like about these events are that they can be done from any part of the world……we have only to execute the performance at any hour of the day and record the duration and time and sent it to the composer. These timings and durations will go to writing a new piece of music in late 2008. Performers should constantly listen to the sounds around them, they are hearing a very unique composition. Also, anything at all of interest should be documented, if something happens (someone accuses you of acting suspicious, a pigeon sits on your head, you fall asleep, you trip up....) please write this down and email them to six_events@yahoo.co.uk Event one BUS Monday January 21st # On the prescribed day you should board any bus, at any time. # The length of your journey should not be premeditated. # When you are ready, alight the bus. # You should record the times you boarded & alighted the bus. *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Event two ROAD Tuesday January 22nd # On the prescribed day, walk down any road. # You should clap your hands together once, at any point. # You may walk at any pace, but must record the name of the road & the duration of how long you walked for. # It is at your discretion to how long you walk for (at the end of the road, you could turn around & walk back.) *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Event three BUILDING Wednesday January 23rd # On the prescribed day you should enter any building. # Discover the building for a duration of up to one hour. # Sit down at least once & close your eyes. # You should record the time you entered & left the building. *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Event four SUPERMARKET Thursday January 24th # On the prescribed day you should enter any supermarket. # Walk down every isle at your own pace. # On your way round you must pick up any item for less then Rs10 # Go back to your original starting place, in the supermarket. # Before paying for your item you must move one other item in the store to another place, an incongruous position on another shelf. # Pay for your item & keep your receipt* # You may not own the bought item, it must be given away or thrown into a bin. *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Event five PUB Friday January 25th # On the prescribed day you should enter any pub & ask one person any question you wish. # You should request a glass of water, you should not drink it. # Leave the pub. # You should record the time you entered and left the pub. *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Event six PARK Sunday January 27th # On the prescribed day you should enter any park # Sit or stand on a green area for any length of time # You should look up to the sky at least once. # You should record the time you entered & left the park. Now, won't that be fun..imagine how many people around the world will be doing the same thing as what we are doing....actually we dont have to doing on all the days, but we could try atleast for one day...... Would love to know who else is doing? Will you?