Just thinking...........

Is it right to criticize someone in their absence? I think we have no right to criticize anybody if we do not have guts to say the same thing on their face. By criticizing we are only conditioning the opinion of other person to look at the person from our angle. We are not giving people chance to make their own opinion. And what are we trying to prove? Are we trying to say that we are superior to them and that person is too week or selfish to meet our standard of expectations? And how does it help us? We are just wasting time in spreading negative vibrations and getting entangled in this web too. And what is the use? If we must criticize, then we must have the courage to do it on their face so that he can improve. There are people who can never change. We have to learn to accept them as they are. For example if the person is having hatred for everybody for no particular reason, then it is not possible for us to help her. How can we help her if she does not know that the problem exists? So, our criticizing her is not going to help her at all, on the contrary, it could make the matter worse. We can only help those who are ready to help themselves. The person has to first admit that the problem exists, she has to be aware that she is hating everybody for no reason at all. Once she recognizes that the problem exists then she can make an effort to change herself. We cannot help anybody who is not ready to accept that the problem exists. In that case, either we accept them as they are, or steer away from her horizon so that it does not bother us. But we are most concerned about people who we love. So what is love? Love is feeling in harmony with the other person, of being on the same wave length and accepting the person as they are, so that there is no conflict at all. Love is feeling oneness with the other person so that you begin to think like them. But many times we don’t understand the meaning of love and we start to suffocate the other person by getting too attached to them. By attaching our self to other, we are only causing pain to our self. We have to learn to live in this world in a detached manner. What is detachment? Detachment is unconditional love. It is unselfish love. A love without any expectation is detachment. To maintain a relationship with attachment is impossible. Too much attachment makes us encroach on their private space and then there is conflict. …….