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Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

Monday 18 May 2009

Pure friendship have no name......



 It is important to hold on to those who genuinely care, because in times like these, they are very rare…..If we loosen our grip or snap our connection, there might not be another chance for redemption.

If we look around us, everybody is getting more and more selfish, and true love has ceased to exist. A do-gooder is always questioned for her intentions/design of why it is done. There has to be some motive behind an act, there can never be a deed without a purpose. Relationships are going sour. There is no genuine love in this world anymore.

What with those crazy labels that are attached to every relationship?

 If you love someone of opposite sex, you will be labeled as flirtatious, show the concern and love to same sex, and you will be labeled as gay/lesbian. Sex plays the important part in everybody’s life; there cannot be pure love anymore, especially not for a person who is single.

 A single person has to be pitied at all cost.

Why didn’t they find a mate? Is something wrong with them? What do single people do in their free time? Do they watch a porno to curb their libido? Or perhaps they use some dildos? Are they sex starved? It’s funny how far their imaginations can run.

 Sometimes I feel like addressing things. And what gets me tired is how often we can see the need to address things before we get tired of doing just that! I mean, why do we have to give explanations of our every deed and every act?

 One advantage a single person enjoys is that they don’t have to deal with insecurities of others. They are their own boss. If they decide to indulge in certain activities, it is purely for their pleasure. If they decide to reach out to people who care, it need not necessarily mean that they seek out sexual contentment.

 But the present scenario of gay/lesbian concept has eclipsed all relationships.

 Ouch! Even an innocent act of just holding hands, or a peck on a cheek, is watched suspiciously. Communication is important ... "how" we communicate is of the utmost importance. In the friendships, there may be pure intimate relationship and there is tendency to read "exactly” what is said without needing or wanting more because the outcome of a conversation may not have as much meaning as it is expected.

We're emotional beings ... right?

No apology necessary there... how we process these emotions and think things through can make all the world of difference.

 Friendship can be experienced and identified individually only by person involved in that relation. Until very recently, much of what has been documented about women's sexuality has been written by men, in the context of male understanding, and relevant to women's associations to men—as their wives, daughters, or mothers,

 During the 17th through 19th centuries, a woman expressing passionate love for another woman was fashionable, accepted, and encouraged. Whether the relationship included any genital component was not a matter for public discourse, but women could form strong and exclusive bonds with each other and still be considered virtuous, innocent, and chaste; a similar relationship with a man would have destroyed a woman's reputation. In fact, these relationships were promoted as alternatives to and practice for a woman's marriage to a man.

Around the turn of the 20th century the development of higher education provided opportunities for women. In all-female surroundings, a culture of romantic pursuit was fostered in women's colleges.

Older students mentored younger ones, called on them socially, took them to all-women dances, sent flowers, cards, and poems that declared their undying love for each other.

The invisibility of lesbians has gradually eroded since the early 1980s.

Psychiatrists and feminist philosophers noted that the rise in women acknowledging same sex relationships is due to growing social acceptance, but also conceded that "only a certain kind of lesbian—slim and elegant or butch in just the right androgynous way—is acceptable to mainstream culture. 

Yet, the term “Lesbians/Gay” is so liberally used in present scenario!

How ignorant can one get? It is outrageous! It has curbed our desire to express our love to people whom we truly care. FB has many applications to express our friendship, but we are afraid to post it to our virtual friends, always afraid of forming a wrong notion. Should we send a bear hug across? a gift perhaps or a comment on superwall? How intimate can one get over the internet?

 Should we really care?

Tuesday 17 February 2009

Just thinking...........

Is it right to criticize someone in their absence? I think we have no right to criticize anybody if we do not have guts to say the same thing on their face. By criticizing we are only conditioning the opinion of other person to look at the person from our angle. We are not giving people chance to make their own opinion. And what are we trying to prove? Are we trying to say that we are superior to them and that person is too week or selfish to meet our standard of expectations? And how does it help us? We are just wasting time in spreading negative vibrations and getting entangled in this web too. And what is the use? If we must criticize, then we must have the courage to do it on their face so that he can improve. There are people who can never change. We have to learn to accept them as they are. For example if the person is having hatred for everybody for no particular reason, then it is not possible for us to help her. How can we help her if she does not know that the problem exists? So, our criticizing her is not going to help her at all, on the contrary, it could make the matter worse. We can only help those who are ready to help themselves. The person has to first admit that the problem exists, she has to be aware that she is hating everybody for no reason at all. Once she recognizes that the problem exists then she can make an effort to change herself. We cannot help anybody who is not ready to accept that the problem exists. In that case, either we accept them as they are, or steer away from her horizon so that it does not bother us. But we are most concerned about people who we love. So what is love? Love is feeling in harmony with the other person, of being on the same wave length and accepting the person as they are, so that there is no conflict at all. Love is feeling oneness with the other person so that you begin to think like them. But many times we don’t understand the meaning of love and we start to suffocate the other person by getting too attached to them. By attaching our self to other, we are only causing pain to our self. We have to learn to live in this world in a detached manner. What is detachment? Detachment is unconditional love. It is unselfish love. A love without any expectation is detachment. To maintain a relationship with attachment is impossible. Too much attachment makes us encroach on their private space and then there is conflict. …….

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